One of the things that the personal development industry seems pretty clear on is setting goals. Often though I don’t think they have really thought through what can go wrong and why man people fail to achieve their goals even when setting them in the commonly accepted way.
The Closer You Get the Harder it Seems
Have you ever seen or been in a situation where you start towards your goal with great strides and make a really good start. But then as you get closer to the goal it seems to get harder until you fail at the very last hurdle?
This is a surprisingly common experience for goal setters. Here is what is happening. Every goal you set also presupposes a lack. For example if you set a goal of having a new car, by the nature of setting the goal it presupposes that you don’t have a new car and that on some level that is important for you.
Now the issue becomes as you get closer to the goal the significance of obtaining it and the current lack of it becomes heightened. And that emotional charge can be the very thing that puts you off your game.
Playing the Emotional Game
When I was younger a group of my mates and I all started learning the guitar at the same time. As you can imagine a bunch of teenage boys starting a new hobby, the competition to be the best guitarist was fierce.
I was constantly learning a new riff, lick, chord or song just so I could show off to my buddies. And invariably I would think I had it mastered. I would get my mates gathered in the school common room ready to show off. And then I would fluff the piece altogether, often dropping the pick in to the sound hole.
They would laugh and walk away. I would shake the guitar until the pick fell out and then with nobody watching I would play the piece perfectly. What I had not really sorted out was how much I was invested in getting it right in front of my mates was a huge stressor. It was the one thing that held me back playing in front of my mates.
The key to goal setting is first set meaningful goals as almost everyone in the personal development industry tells you. But then to let go of the emotional attachment surrounding the lack of having the goal. The better than 25% discount on the Confidence Booster is still running and on that course you will learn how to let go of negative emotions of this sort. Click through and find out more here: