Would you like to rediscover an incredibly powerful tool that can give you instant power or an edge in any situation? Would you be interested in learning the key to NLP that other people have paid thousands of pounds for? It is all in this article.
The Trouble with NLP Techniques
Imagine if I pointed to a wheel and called it a car, or perhaps pointed to the engine, or the doors. At best these are only parts of a car and once you get the idea of a car you might also realise that doors, tyres and engines come in many different shapes and sizes.
But once you get this you might also realise a car is only a vehicle (pun intended) for a bigger value proposition. That value might be transportation, freedom, fun or a whole host of other possibilities. Every part of a car is important and often necessary for the whole car to work. But thinking on the level of car parts means you will never experience the ride. When you start thinking on the level of values, purpose and outcomes the car can become a way of achieving something much more important.
The trouble with NLP is that it tends to create loads of tools and techniques. The issue this creates is some people think techniques are NLP. Some people even write big books of techniques and wave around their NLPness as if size really matters. This traps people into thinking in a small way when you could use NLP to expand your thinking.
Explaining NLP should give you something powerful and expansive that you can use to create real results. So here are some thoughts on what I think NLP is about.
You have a natural process that you have known your whole life. You probably don’t use it enough and it can give you a edge in almost every situation and it defines NLP perfectly for me. I was reminded of it recently by a great FaceBook friend that is a student in my private study group. Here is the heart of NLP encapsulated in one experiment.
Modelling, the Key to NLP
In this paragraph is the essence of NLP and the secret to getting massive results.
When I was fifteen I fell hopelessly in love as only a teenager can. The trouble was that I was so caught up in my terror of stepping out of my comfort zone I didn’t know how to approach the girl of my dreams. For weeks it was a silent, one sided relationship that I suspect the girl didn’t know she was in. And then I re discovered a technique that we all know how to use.
Remember as children you learnt things by modelling. You would act out, pretend or put on a persona in the playground. In your imagination you can be astronauts, princesses, or superheroes.
NLP is just about finding a model of excellence and working out how they do that. Often the biggest results come from asking that simple question, “What would “x” do in this situation?” Where “x” is your model of excellence.
There are a whole lot of different ways you can then build on this. You can hone your use of the skills by “using” them through the eyes of the expert. You can increase your motivation by imagining the future results. You can even check if this is the right thing to do by imagining the consequences. You could even treat phobias by imagining various ways of interrupting the pattern. Athletes and business people alike use variations of these ideas as part of their mental training. There is no end of possibilities.
When I was fifteen I started a relationship which was short and intense as only a teenage relationship can be. And even though the relationship was over a long time ago, by the fact that I am still talking about it, it is still having an impact on my life today. That relationship started with a question in my head that was something like, “How would James Bond approach this woman?”
I put on my mental tuxedo, adjusted the imaginary bow tie and carried my bag of chips like a Martini. With all the charm, sophistication and swagger of an international super spy I went over and spoke with her for the first time.
So where do all these NLP Techniques come from?
Well if we look at the local store example above we could get several things from this. We could take the exchange and call it a technique i.e. relax, smile and say, “Have a good evening…Now”. This is typically what these big books of NLPness do.
You could take the bigger concept i.e. By asking the question, “How would “x” deal with this situation?” you will have a process that you can use in multiple situations and can gain useful insights from. For this sort of thing you need to start thinking about the process behind the process. Some of the best NLPers operate on this level consistently.
But there is another level that you could look at this from. The person in the local store has an attitude and a methodology that created the opportunity to generate and play with a simple language pattern and the “How would x…” question. Now what would life be like if you could be in the head of someone like this and deconstruct their thought processes? This is where NLP really has power.
For example how useful would it be to be able to look at:
- A successful sale professional and apply their skills to dating
- Look at someone with a phobia and screw up their fear process so they can’t access their phobia any longer
- Install a compulsive extrovert personality into someone that is terminally shy
- Model the process of how a small business became a multimillion pound organisation and apply the same processes to your business
But much more than this, learn how you can apply the methodology to create an edge in any circumstance?
How Do I Find Out More?
If you are interested in how this approach applies to Hypnotic Persuasion Skills then have a look at the Persuasion Skills on Steroids Deconstructed. On this course I take you through multiple layers of perception. You can see the course as a student, as an observer noticing the impact I have on my audience, through my eyes and finally through a filter based on how you are going to use the skills. Click through and discover more here.
But if you want to really learn how to model, deconstruct and build processes for yourself then there are a few places left on my NLP Practitioner Course.