Below is an email from Jan who is just coming up to the third lesson of The Persuasion Skills Black Book and is getting some great results already. I have posted the email in full because there are a couple of really good points that are worth bringing up about persuasion and influence that will help you boost your results through the roof.
I’ll let you read the email first.
NLP Persuasion Techniques Example
I appreciate the examples provided in the first two lessons and the practical application examples you provide.
I manage an operation where I employ between 11 to 14 individuals at a time.
All of these people come from different ethnic backgrounds, with different upbringings and all of them have very different core values and beliefs. I used the “I agree” statement today in my interactions with different employees and in many instances, it was to sort perceptions of the companies approach to profitability or to delegate. When I used the “I agree” statement in sorting perceptions it validated what I always believed – that two parallel truths can co-exist.
I used the “I agree” statement in the exact example used in lesson two – I was delegating a new task to a CSR who had a concern with time constraints and I was able to say “I agree and this is why time management will be crucial, lets take some time to review how this can be accomplished without impacting your time.”
You have me fired up and I am excited to learn lesson 3! Can you tell me how I can have access to lesson 1 and 2 while we move on into lesson 3 next week?
Perceptual Positions and the Nature of Reality
Jan’s comment about “two parallel truths” is spot on and can really help your persuasion skills. The only perspective you really have on a situation is your own. And the one you need to understand for great persuasion skills is your subject’s.
For example: When I was a junior trainer in a large organisation there was a need for me to move into an evaluation team. Anyone that knows me will know I am hopeless at detail, numbers and spreadsheets because I hate it (for you NLPers out there, yes I can change it…and I enjoy hating these things so I am not going to >:P
My boss at the time loved exactly those things and was desperately trying to motivate me into moving into the team by telling me what fun I would have making graphs out of all the numbers and finding all the little errors by sifting through mountains of data. I was close to leaving after every one of these motivation sessions.
All he had to do was understand where I was coming from rather than what he would like. Simply, at the time I had a vision of me being a great trainer. My identity was based on this and all of my career outcomes revolved around this vision. All my boss needed to say was all great trainers are good at training evaluation. If he had said that, nothing on earth would have kept me from moving into the role. It was experience I had not got and was important for my identity. AND I would have loved every minute of working in that department.
That’s right despite saying I hate everything about that sort of work I would have loved working there. The reason being I would be learning and experiencing a whole new aspect of the training cycle that was making me a better trainer.
Perceptual Positions and the Nature of Reality
Two separate and even conflicting realities and either could have been triggered by my manager. He chose one that made my life difficult only because he did not understand me at a deep enough level to realise how he could have got me exceptionally motivated.
Jan is realising the same thing in her email. The organisational outcomes and personal outcomes from a situation do not need to be the same.
Your reality is only a matter of perspective and it can / does change. If my manager had been focused on my version of reality he might have seen the easy route to change it and create a new reality that gave the company what was needed and made me a happier man.
A classic NLP Technique to help with this is Perceptual Positions. On a good Persuasion Skills Course you will learn many different ways of altering a perception of reality whether your own or other for people.
On a persuasion skills course you will develop processes to construct and apply the nature of dual reality. In Jan’s example she is talking about two separate realities, a company one and one for an individual. In my example the realities, or at least the potential for each of them were in my head only. Being able to utilise these is the art of covert hypnosis.
Jan thanks for allowing me to post your great email and I am glad you are getting so much from The Persuasion Skills Black Book already.